My Younger Son refers to my OOA as “Armitage Shanks”…. as in, “What are you watching? Oh, Armitage Shanks again?” Apparently, he finds this endlessly funny!
So, let’s explore the possible definitions of “Armitage Shanks”:
- Armatage Shanks (sic) – The Song:
My Family are big Green Day fans, owning all the albums and being represented at each of the last two Vancouver concerts. Legend has it that during the band’s first tour to England, Billie Joe Armstrong was struck by the name seen on all the urinals there. Writing a song after a break-up, and feeling like his life and thoughts were going down the drain, he called it “Armatage Shanks” using a slightly altered spelling.
Stranded… lost inside myself
My own worst friend
And my own closest enemy
2. Armitage Shanks – The Urinal:
This was apparently the inspiration for the song above. According to the company website:
Armitage Shanks is a British institution with a history dating back to the early nineteenth century. Its specialisation in commercial products has made it the market leader in non-residential washrooms.
3. Armitage Shanks – The Knives:
Well, now we’re getting closer! According to “The Online Slang Dictionary”, a “shank” is “a makeshift object used for stabbing”. While John Porter used an actual knife during Episode 2 of Strike Back, he certainly was resourceful in the way he transported the knife to have it at hand when needed.
4. Armitage Shanks – The Legs:
Finally, here we are at the pièce de résistance, the Armitage Shanks that the discerning eye will appreciate. The first definition in the “Oxford Living Dictionary” defines “shank” as “A person’s [in this case Armitage’s] leg, especially the part from the knee to the ankle.” Here are several prime examples for your viewing pleasure:
So, with this final (and most enjoyable) definition, I can finally agree confidently:
“Yes! I am watching Armitage Shanks!”